All I Wanted Was To Watch A Movie

I went to see Iron Man 2 yesterday with my Dad and brother at a Cinema Draft House in the area. The place is old, was originally built way back in 1914 (http://www.oldtowntheater.com/history.htm). So we are sitting in our rather comfortable seats and this older gentlemen comes down in front and demands that everyone pay attention to him. He turns out to be the owner and then goes on to

1) Berate the audience for not filling up the entire theater
2) Explain why the American soccer team will never win the world cup and how our style is too wishy-washy
3) Clap for our troops and explain how he was one of the last cowboy helicopter pilots and did two tours in 'Nam.
4) Taught us the importance of know which eye is your dominant eye and how to determine it including yelling at everyone to put there hand up so we could find out
5) Gave us his theory on why older people can't see while driving at night and tips for fixing that situation
6) A history lesson on the theater, how much he paid for it, and that he is retiring soon

It had to be the single most surreal experience I have ever had at a movie theater. All I could do was thinking 'Am I going to have to go through this every time I come to this theater?'.