Despite the vast differences in their ages, ethnicity, and religious upbringing, the sexual chemistry between Roberto and Heather was the most amazing he had ever experienced; and for the entirety of the Labor Day weekend they had sex like monkeys on espresso, not those monkeys in the zoo that fling their feces at you, but more like the monkeys in the wild that have those giant red butts, and access to an espresso machine.
---Dennis Barry, Dothan, AL
That is the winner of the Romance category of the 2006 Bulwer Lytton fiction awards. Good stuff if you are bored and need something to do.
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