This post has been brewing for a while. Do I, or don't I, have trouble with 'strong women'? I put it in '' because I think part of the issue here is what the hell do people mean by 'strong women'? It is right up there with hippy, high maintenance and even bitch to some degree (see below) as far as things that people think they know what it means but that definition is WIDELY different for each person. This may ruffle some feathers but only because I think it is a very sensitive subject. I truely struggle with this so feedback is a good thing.
Do I have problems with strong women? Well, that all depends on what you mean by a strong woman. I don't believe I do. In fact, as I think about the women I am friends with I would consider each and every one of them a strong woman. They stand up for themselves and voice their opinions as strongly if not stronger than a lot of the guys I know. I've had probably more spirited and enlightening conversations with them as a whole than with the fellas.
So why, then, do I get this 'problem with strong women' criticism thrown at me from time to time by different people? I don't get it. So I brought this up in a conversation with some friends last week to get some feedback.
Here is the deal from my perspective. It all comes down to the 'bitch' term. The HRC candidacy really highlights this. How can a woman be strong and not be considered a bitch? Or, more importantly, why is it that when a woman is forceful or very vocal (particularly in the workplace) she is labeled a bitch while if a guy does it he is just motivated or whatever? Good questions, for sure. I can only speak for myself here but when I call a woman a 'bitch' or, more likely, the 'devil incarnate' it isn't because she is strong so much as she is being rude as hell. When guys do the same thing I can them assholes or other such lovely things. What really gets me is when I get slammed for perceived offenses or the attitude that I owe them something, that drives me nuts in anyone, not just women. So I think, for me, with men and women, there is a line between being forceful, vocal and spirited and being a total rude shit and when that gets crossed I call people on it (even if it isn't to their face - I hate direct confrontation ;) ). So if that translates into a problem with 'strong women' then fine. But I think that it really translates more into a problem with rude assholes than any inherent issues with people that stand up for themselves.
Am I full of shit here?