Came from here.
Man, that site takes me back to the fear of those two months. Crazy.
Monday, November 03, 2008
Path To Victory
This link talks about Obama's path to victory. The good part:
I've maintained that we will probably know the winner by 10 pm tomorrow night if PA and VA go Obama, which they should unless something funky happens.
Notice what is missing though? Flordia. No one gives a crap about Flordia, it just doesn't play in to the calc. And Ohio is only one of five. Such a welcome change from the past two cycles with only one or two battleground states.
There will be upsets and disappointments, but on the whole this is looking pretty good for those of us on the left.
Finally.
That leaves our five states in play. The victory conditions for Obama involving these five states proceed something as follows:
1. Win Pennsylvania and ANY ONE of Colorado, Virginia, Ohio, or Nevada*
2. Win Ohio and EITHER Colorado OR Virginia.
3. Win Colorado AND Virginia AND Nevada.
(* Nevada produces a 269-269 tie, which would probably be resolved for Obama in the House of Represenatives.)
Now, suppose you think that Colorado is already in the bag for Obama because of his large edge in early voting there. We can then simplify the victory conditions as follows:
1. Win Pennsylvania
2. Win Ohio
3. Win Virginia AND Nevada
I've maintained that we will probably know the winner by 10 pm tomorrow night if PA and VA go Obama, which they should unless something funky happens.
Notice what is missing though? Flordia. No one gives a crap about Flordia, it just doesn't play in to the calc. And Ohio is only one of five. Such a welcome change from the past two cycles with only one or two battleground states.
There will be upsets and disappointments, but on the whole this is looking pretty good for those of us on the left.
Finally.
Saturday, November 01, 2008
I Like This Picture
I like this picture of me, from sailing.
And
here is an album with lots of pictures from the sailing trip.
Man, I so want to go again soon.
Friday, October 31, 2008
The Mortgage Crisis - What Caused It
A friend of mine sent out an email recently making a case for regulation causing the mortgage crisis, as opposed to de-regulation. I've asked him if I could post or link to (if available) his argument.
In either case, I wanted to post my rebuttal. Please feel free to chime in with questions or comments.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
I think you missed some stuff while overstating the case in other places.
First off, Fannie and Freddie didn't even get into the mess until 2006 (here) or so, well after the bubble began and these bullshit loans started. And even then they don't make loans, but purchase existing loans. So to imply that they were forced to make loans to low-income families and thus caused the whole thing to come crashing down is a bit dishonest.
Second, the CRA didn't force private banks to do anything, and certainly didn't force them to change underwriting rules and make up NINJA loans and the type. It was also enacted in 1977. It is just now becoming an issue? Hardly. Here is a different take on it.
Third, the poor don't exactly have a lot of money and the loans they were getting were pretty small in the grand the scheme of things. The big guys, like Bears and Lerhmann brothers were the ones making the bad bets and then packaging them with good ones and reselling them as derivative securities to companies like, well...Fannie and Freddie who have always been tasked to do so since their creation. Their entire point of existence was to help guarantee loans to banks so that more people could get into houses. It was the greed of the lenders, their willingness to throw out rules and no oversight that allowed this to fester and explode like this. In fact, this study shows that CRA banks only made up between 20 and 25% of the subprime loans and were less likely to make such a loan. So who is responsible for the remaining 75% or so?
Forth, let us not forget the rating agencies complicity in this. They went along and rated these derivatives highly even though it was a load of crap. How were they allowed to do this? Deregulation! Nice write up on all of this here.
Fifth, $127,000 is dick compared to the nearly $2 million McCain's campaign manager was paid by Fannie and Freddie as president of an advocacy group whose purpose was to defend them from, you guessed it, regulation (here)! Opps.
Finally, regardless of the responsibility for the mortgage issue, it has gone well beyond that into the credit industry because of CDS that were not regulated at all and had no transparency. That is the bigger issue here and the cause for all of these banks to fail and the $700 bailout. The mortgage crisis just brought about the inevitable sooner than later.
In either case, I wanted to post my rebuttal. Please feel free to chime in with questions or comments.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
I think you missed some stuff while overstating the case in other places.
First off, Fannie and Freddie didn't even get into the mess until 2006 (here) or so, well after the bubble began and these bullshit loans started. And even then they don't make loans, but purchase existing loans. So to imply that they were forced to make loans to low-income families and thus caused the whole thing to come crashing down is a bit dishonest.
Second, the CRA didn't force private banks to do anything, and certainly didn't force them to change underwriting rules and make up NINJA loans and the type. It was also enacted in 1977. It is just now becoming an issue? Hardly. Here is a different take on it.
Third, the poor don't exactly have a lot of money and the loans they were getting were pretty small in the grand the scheme of things. The big guys, like Bears and Lerhmann brothers were the ones making the bad bets and then packaging them with good ones and reselling them as derivative securities to companies like, well...Fannie and Freddie who have always been tasked to do so since their creation. Their entire point of existence was to help guarantee loans to banks so that more people could get into houses. It was the greed of the lenders, their willingness to throw out rules and no oversight that allowed this to fester and explode like this. In fact, this study shows that CRA banks only made up between 20 and 25% of the subprime loans and were less likely to make such a loan. So who is responsible for the remaining 75% or so?
Forth, let us not forget the rating agencies complicity in this. They went along and rated these derivatives highly even though it was a load of crap. How were they allowed to do this? Deregulation! Nice write up on all of this here.
Fifth, $127,000 is dick compared to the nearly $2 million McCain's campaign manager was paid by Fannie and Freddie as president of an advocacy group whose purpose was to defend them from, you guessed it, regulation (here)! Opps.
Finally, regardless of the responsibility for the mortgage issue, it has gone well beyond that into the credit industry because of CDS that were not regulated at all and had no transparency. That is the bigger issue here and the cause for all of these banks to fail and the $700 bailout. The mortgage crisis just brought about the inevitable sooner than later.
Are You Registered To Vote
Are you?
If you are in Virginia, check out this tool. It'll tell you if you are registered properly, where to vote, what the ballot will look like, what districs you are in, etc. Awesome resource.
If you are in Virginia, check out this tool. It'll tell you if you are registered properly, where to vote, what the ballot will look like, what districs you are in, etc. Awesome resource.
Spheres!
It would be cool to hang out in one of these for a weekend. Kinda reminds me of a cabin in a sailboat a little.
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Hard Candy
I have been up most of the night watching free horror flicks on Fear Net via Comcast On Demand. It it was of my vices. The first three (2001 Maniacs, Are You Scared and Graveyard) were your typical hack-n-slash sorta flicks. One was in the same vein as Saw. They were entertaining, even a bit hard to watch at times.
The last one, however, was great. It is called 'Hard Candy' and stars Ellen Page of 'Juno' fame. Good god is that girl good. And talk about role reversals. There is no gore (ok, very very little) in the entire movie but it is easily one of the most disturbing things I've seen. Probably not the best Halloween movie though, particularly for guys. I got pretty squeamish due to some suggestive stuff aimed at male parts in the middle of it.
In any case, if you want to see some really powerful acting my Ellen Page and some interesting role reversal stuff, and don't mind being a bit disturbed, check it out.
Rare to find a gem like that in the free movies.
The last one, however, was great. It is called 'Hard Candy' and stars Ellen Page of 'Juno' fame. Good god is that girl good. And talk about role reversals. There is no gore (ok, very very little) in the entire movie but it is easily one of the most disturbing things I've seen. Probably not the best Halloween movie though, particularly for guys. I got pretty squeamish due to some suggestive stuff aimed at male parts in the middle of it.
In any case, if you want to see some really powerful acting my Ellen Page and some interesting role reversal stuff, and don't mind being a bit disturbed, check it out.
Rare to find a gem like that in the free movies.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Stuck
So what do you do when past stuff gets so in the way that it seems impossible to move forward? I wish there was a 'Do Over' button or a 'Wipe the Slate Clean' switch or something. You learn, you make mistakes, you change but it seems that in the process of doing so the hurts involved in growing build up and feel as though they can't be overcome.
It is heartbreakingly frustrating and I don't know how to unravel this knot.
I'd like my Easy Button now, please.
It is heartbreakingly frustrating and I don't know how to unravel this knot.
I'd like my Easy Button now, please.
Monday, October 27, 2008
Bye Bye Mr. Series Of Tubes
Hahahahahahahaha! That corrupt punk-ass is on his way out and the Dems are most likely going to be one seat closer to a 60-seat majority thanks to Alaska of all places.
Ted Stevens, for those of you who don't know, chaired the committee under the Repubs that oversees the Internet. And if you are unaware of all Internet traditions, his understanding of the Internet is lacking, to say the least. To Wit! And the Remix Version. This was in relation to the (hopefully forever) dead Net Neutrality Bill.
Ted Stevens, for those of you who don't know, chaired the committee under the Repubs that oversees the Internet. And if you are unaware of all Internet traditions, his understanding of the Internet is lacking, to say the least. To Wit! And the Remix Version. This was in relation to the (hopefully forever) dead Net Neutrality Bill.
Giants Yardsigns and John Galt
John Galt is Ayn Rand's character in the book 'Atlas Shrugs' who more or less defines free market fundamentalism (or objectivism). Alan Greenspan was one of Ayn's disciples and it was his polices - the ideals of free market funamentalism of deregulation and the like - that led to the S&L crisis and this mess we are in now. This is a great article detailing where Greenspan came from and how we went from Ayn Rand to financial disaster. The free market is a pipe dream.
In other news, during the Iraq war when people were running around calling liberals traitors because we dared question the crazies, we were told we didn't support the troops because we questioned. All we needed to do was to clap louder and everything would turn out just peachy. Well, apparently the 'clap louder' strategy has morphed into the 'biggest yard sign' strategy. I don't know if anyone else noticed but McCain fans like their signs big. As proof, I submit this.
Clap louder, people. Use your brain, Vote McMain.
Can we laugh at these people now?
In other news, during the Iraq war when people were running around calling liberals traitors because we dared question the crazies, we were told we didn't support the troops because we questioned. All we needed to do was to clap louder and everything would turn out just peachy. Well, apparently the 'clap louder' strategy has morphed into the 'biggest yard sign' strategy. I don't know if anyone else noticed but McCain fans like their signs big. As proof, I submit this.
Clap louder, people. Use your brain, Vote McMain.
Can we laugh at these people now?
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Famous People Blogs
I've linked to Newsgroper before. It is a site that has people pretending to blog as various famous people. Only other 'famous' people can comment on the entries as well.
John McCain has his own. This is pretty funny. The comments on this one are pretty good.
Sarah Palin's.
Obamarama.
And of course, Christopher Walken.
Lots of them. See if your favorites are there.
John McCain has his own. This is pretty funny. The comments on this one are pretty good.
Sarah Palin's.
Obamarama.
And of course, Christopher Walken.
Lots of them. See if your favorites are there.
Saturday, October 25, 2008
Friday, October 24, 2008
Election Craziness Perspective
I have been hoping someone would do this for a long time. I've always maintained that the crazy crap that the media spews isn't new, it is just hitting a wider audience because of the accessibility of it.
That linky talks about the various themes that rotate through elections and where they first started. You know, 100+ years ago.
Good stuff. #3 is the best. Particularly the last line.
That linky talks about the various themes that rotate through elections and where they first started. You know, 100+ years ago.
Good stuff. #3 is the best. Particularly the last line.
Vice Presidencial History
With all the crazy regarding Sarah Palin I have been wanting to check out the history of the VP office. I could have sworn that originally it was the 2nd place finisher to the presidency that became VP. Turns out, for the first 15 years or so that was indeed the case. Wild.
Anyway, this is a good summary of the history of the office.
Anyway, this is a good summary of the history of the office.
Your Sign - Abbreviated
This came from an email with the usual 'forward or you will die' sorta stuff attached to it. I yanked out that bit because I thought the short, concise descriptions were pretty good. For those of you w/o the time or inclination to look up those long descriptions. Waddya think?
Mine was right on.
CAPRICORN - The Go-Getter (Dec 22 -Jan 19) Patient and wise. Practical and rigid. Ambitious. Tends to be Good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimistic. Capricorns tend to act before they think and can be Unfriendly at times. Hold grudges. Like competition. Get what they Want.
AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart (Jan 20 - Feb 18) Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality.
PISCES - The Dreamer (Feb 19 - Mar 20) Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative.May become secretive and vague. Sensitive. Don't like details. Dreamy and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. Good kisser. Beautiful.
ARIES - The Daredevil (Mar 21 - April 19) Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish. Short fuse. (Easily angered.) Lively, passionate, and sharp wit. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly - easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic.
TAURUS - The Enduring One (April 20 - May 20) Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings that are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice.Loving and kind. Loves hard - passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous.
GEMINI - The Chatterbox (May 21 - June 20) Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic. Adaptable But needs to express themselves. Argumentative and outspoken. Like change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and tense. Gossips. May seem superficial or inconsistent. Beautiful physically and mentally.
CANCER - The Protector (June 21 - July 22) Moody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life. Protective. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others. Easily hurt, but sympathetic.
LEO - The Boss (July 23 - Aug 22) Very organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundaries. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Like to help Others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. Sensitive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. Doing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive.
VIRGO - The Perfectionist (Aug 23 - Sept 22) Dominant In relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argumentative. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hardworking. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to.Hard to please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic.
LIBRA - The Harmonizer (Sept 23 - Oct22) Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible.
SCORPIO - The Intense One (Oct 23 - Nov 21) Very energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hardworking. Great kisser. Can become obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive. Determined. Loves being in long Relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be self-centered at times. Passionate and Emotional.
SAGITTARIUS - The Happy-Go-Lucky One (Nov 22 - Dec 21) Good-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome). Indulges self. Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious. Doesn't like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes. Doesn't like being doubted. Beautiful inside and out.
Mine was right on.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Obamarama! - Trapped!
Obamarama! - Mark Warner Style
Obamarama - Excitement Unknown
Obamarama! - View from the Ground
Obamarama! - View from the Ground
Obamarama! - Peeps Behind Us
Monday, October 20, 2008
Obama in Leesburg Wednesday
Obama will be at Ida Lee Park in Leesubrg, VA at 3 pm this Wednesday. Anyone want to join me?
Friday, October 17, 2008
Eagle Eye
Now, you all know that I rarely come across a movie I don't enjoy. So with that said, I enjoyed Eagle Eye greatly. It is like a cross between 'Enemy of the State' and the Anime 'Ghost in the Shell'. The first half is a mystery since you have no idea what is going on nor do the characters. Couple parts in an extended car chase scene made me go 'wow'.
Once they reveal how most of it fits together a little past half way through the rest of the movie is about how to stop whatever it is, etc. It leaves some mystery going until the very end. I liked the plot because of the 'Ghost in the Machine' sorta tie in.
All in all, it is a good movie if you want something distracting for a couple of hours.
Once they reveal how most of it fits together a little past half way through the rest of the movie is about how to stop whatever it is, etc. It leaves some mystery going until the very end. I liked the plot because of the 'Ghost in the Machine' sorta tie in.
All in all, it is a good movie if you want something distracting for a couple of hours.
Thursday, October 16, 2008
So I Sit
So I sit in this big ass theater right in the middle with my gallon of lemonade and nachos waiting for the movie to start. It has occurred to me to sit up in the back right corner and look suspicious but I decided against that.
This is why I prefer to be late to movies instead of early. Too many damn commercials and my mind wonders all over the place.
Now a couple has shown up and the theater doesn't feel as, I don't know, solitary? And now more people.
Let the movie begin!
This is why I prefer to be late to movies instead of early. Too many damn commercials and my mind wonders all over the place.
Now a couple has shown up and the theater doesn't feel as, I don't know, solitary? And now more people.
Let the movie begin!
Joe Update
Just got off the phone with Joe. He sounds very update and cheerful. Here is the deal.
He has had four operations with one more scheduled in January then radiation. The tumor was never cancerous but the radiation is the only way to get at the last part of it. They think he may have had it since birth and it just kept growing until it hit 'critical mass'.
The down side to all of this is that he is deaf on his right side and he can only make out blurred shapes. The eye sight most likely won't come back, unfortunately, so he has been looking into schools for Braille and the like.
On the plus side, he has lost a lot of weight and is still alive. :)
All and all, like I said before he is very upbeat about all of this and taking it in stride. If anyone who knows him wants to join me in a visit sometime, let me know.
He has had four operations with one more scheduled in January then radiation. The tumor was never cancerous but the radiation is the only way to get at the last part of it. They think he may have had it since birth and it just kept growing until it hit 'critical mass'.
The down side to all of this is that he is deaf on his right side and he can only make out blurred shapes. The eye sight most likely won't come back, unfortunately, so he has been looking into schools for Braille and the like.
On the plus side, he has lost a lot of weight and is still alive. :)
All and all, like I said before he is very upbeat about all of this and taking it in stride. If anyone who knows him wants to join me in a visit sometime, let me know.
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Simple Lesson My Ass
Just came across this from that Astrology site:
I may be over reacting to this one a bit.
Check please.
The great moral lesson to be learned by the chidren of Mercury is a relatively easy one...they must learn to mean what they say.
I may be over reacting to this one a bit.
Check please.
How Does This Sound?
"Our experiences color the way we perceive the world around us. Understanding those perceptions and where they came from can help avoid the assumptions and miscommunications at the heart of most of our misery."
Thoughts?
Thoughts?
Fricken Astrology
So this site was recently mentioned on another blog and I spent some time poking around it. Recently, hippy magic has started to play a larger interest in my life. Just to put it in perspective, I don't care why something works. If it appears to have an affect or is more accurate than not, that is good enough for me.
Anyway, like I said I started to poke around on the site and read about Gemini's. As I found out recently, I'm a triple gem so that makes it pretty easy to remember my moon and ascendent signs. I thought I'd quote some stuff and then add some commentary, just because.
I don't know about youth but the first two fit. I love telling stories, even though I suck at it from time to time. And communication, well...yea.
Damn it.
If this doesn't sum up what I've been about for the past year or so I don't know what does. At least in my head, anyway.
This makes me sad.
It seems to be that changeable and inquisitiv aren't necessarily bad traits? Cunning as well. Superficial...boo.
And a gossip, me? Ha!
Yes indeed. The conventional learning part in particular. Totally dropped out of college because of that stuff. Couldn't get into it.
That one is interesting for a lot of reasons I'm not sure I can get into right now.
The 'displays of withdrawal' bit on this one is what really caught my attention. I go through these phases, pretty short on either side, of wanting to hang out with people and be totally active...and then close myself in my house and not go anywhere. They usually cycle through several times a week. Nothing personal, just need to recharge I guess.
Ain't that the truth.
This vexes me.
Ya, understanding is pretty important. In some past relationships I've felt I had to justify my actions or couldn't be who I was. That sucked and made for a depressed Ryan.
Sad again. Stupid fears.
This is something that still can get to me but I think I have dealt with this one pretty well. Back in High School I used to get SO bent out-of-shape when my plans would fall apart. I mean like super frustrated and pissy. I dealt with that mostly by not putting together concrete plans anymore. Now I try to come up with a 'framework'...a generalized idea of what I want to do but try to remain very flexible. That works well for me.
In other words, 'COMMENT DAMN IT!'. :D
Displayed without comment.
Again w/o comment.
That was in the physical appearance section talking about hair. Wild.
This bit more or less describes what has gotten me into the situation I find myself. My conversation on Monday morning was all about this and getting permission to be Ok with my feelings and not have to evaluate them. Inconsistency is the bain of my existence sometimes.
Word. I like the last sentence the most. Several years ago when I first started toying with the idea of taking medication one of my main reasons was because I couldn't concentrate on anything for a long period of time. ADD runs in the male side of the family so I figured that a 'magic pill' may be able to help me out. Well, while meds have helped with some anxiety stuff my ability to concentrate is still shit. But I've come to accept it more and an embrace it.
Ok, this has gotten long enough. Found it interesting and helpful. Go look up your stuff!
Anyway, like I said I started to poke around on the site and read about Gemini's. As I found out recently, I'm a triple gem so that makes it pretty easy to remember my moon and ascendent signs. I thought I'd quote some stuff and then add some commentary, just because.
Gemini is the Third Sign of the Zodiac, associated with storytellers, communicators and youth.
I don't know about youth but the first two fit. I love telling stories, even though I suck at it from time to time. And communication, well...yea.
these individuals should strive to learn perseverence and cultivate depth. They need to aspire to substance as well as style, attempting to take themselves...and their words...more seriously.
Damn it.
organize personal experiences in order to form a unique picture of the world and then communicate those perceptions to others
If this doesn't sum up what I've been about for the past year or so I don't know what does. At least in my head, anyway.
The opposite sign to Gemini is Saggitarius. From Saggitarius, Gemini can learn to absorb a broader view of life and provide structure to the mass of information which is inherently collected. Thus, can Gemini natives learn to discover the truth.
This makes me sad.
Negative Traits: changeable, restless, inquisitive, inconsistent, superficial, cunning, nervous, tense and something of a gossip.
It seems to be that changeable and inquisitiv aren't necessarily bad traits? Cunning as well. Superficial...boo.
And a gossip, me? Ha!
Likes: talking, novelty, variety, anything unusual and working on multiple projects at the same time.
Dislikes: being alone, being in a rut, mental inaction, conventional learning and feeling tied down.
Yes indeed. The conventional learning part in particular. Totally dropped out of college because of that stuff. Couldn't get into it.
Spiritual Goal: To learn how to cooperate
That one is interesting for a lot of reasons I'm not sure I can get into right now.
Gemini natives are imaginative, generous and affectionate, but their frequent desire for change often makes them dissatisfied with existing conditions. Friends of those born under this influence of this Sign love the cheerfulness, quick wit and lively mind inherent in the Gemini make-up, but are often puzzled by the displays of withdrawal which are also a feature of this Zodiac Sign.
The 'displays of withdrawal' bit on this one is what really caught my attention. I go through these phases, pretty short on either side, of wanting to hang out with people and be totally active...and then close myself in my house and not go anywhere. They usually cycle through several times a week. Nothing personal, just need to recharge I guess.
In short, due to an insatiable urge to invade new territory, the Gemini individual tends to be free with what he or she does not need or want and may frequently neglect or reject much that could be useful and/or valuable.
Ain't that the truth.
that alhough they have been born under two lucky stars (instead of just one, like most others), this double luck can run out and result in nothing.
This vexes me.
it is important for Gemini individuals to be in touch with those who understand them. If not, then there is a tendency to wilt and undergo an intellectual suffering that few will be able to fully comprehend.
Ya, understanding is pretty important. In some past relationships I've felt I had to justify my actions or couldn't be who I was. That sucked and made for a depressed Ryan.
Gemini's reach for the perfect human relationship will probably mean that such an individual is constantly disappointed until he or she realizes that there truly is no such thing as a "perfect relationship." Indeed, it may be Gemini's secret fear that he or she will never find a true "soul-mate" for life.
Sad again. Stupid fears.
There is a tendency here to want everything to go smoothly and according to plan without any personal effort.
This is something that still can get to me but I think I have dealt with this one pretty well. Back in High School I used to get SO bent out-of-shape when my plans would fall apart. I mean like super frustrated and pissy. I dealt with that mostly by not putting together concrete plans anymore. Now I try to come up with a 'framework'...a generalized idea of what I want to do but try to remain very flexible. That works well for me.
Gemini individuals need constant feedback for the good of their souls.
In other words, 'COMMENT DAMN IT!'. :D
[snip]...coupled with an amusingly biased outlook on varying human situations. With regard to serious issues, however, Gemini is invariably scrupulously fair and unbiased.
Displayed without comment.
can close a potentially romantic chapter with more finality than any other male of the Zodiac when he suspects something valuable and dear will be lost to him should he choose to continue.
Again w/o comment.
However, there is often a tendency toward greyness rather early in life.
That was in the physical appearance section talking about hair. Wild.
the swift mental activity of the inherent Gemini character coupled with the emotionality of the Moon causes feelings to be held in too much scrutiny. The Gemini Moon expresses emotions in an uneven and inconsistent manner while harboring a direct need to speak the truth.
This bit more or less describes what has gotten me into the situation I find myself. My conversation on Monday morning was all about this and getting permission to be Ok with my feelings and not have to evaluate them. Inconsistency is the bain of my existence sometimes.
The Gemini Sun/Gemini Moon combination produces what could be described as a personality of very high voltage electricity. This will not be a steady and smooth flow of electricity, but rather one composed of static charges which are constantly active and bound from one place to another. [snip] No matter how hard Gemini natives ruled by a Gemini Moon might try, they are not apt to "burn a hole" of concentrative intensity through anything.
Word. I like the last sentence the most. Several years ago when I first started toying with the idea of taking medication one of my main reasons was because I couldn't concentrate on anything for a long period of time. ADD runs in the male side of the family so I figured that a 'magic pill' may be able to help me out. Well, while meds have helped with some anxiety stuff my ability to concentrate is still shit. But I've come to accept it more and an embrace it.
Ok, this has gotten long enough. Found it interesting and helpful. Go look up your stuff!
Friday, October 10, 2008
Taken the First Step
Well, that post helped a lot. As well as some of the encouragement I've received from others for quite a while. I contacted the one person I think that may be able to help me take the first steps towards whatever is next and will be meeting Monday morning.
Now I'm all sorts of anxious about it. I didn't think I would be, but there you go.
In any case, I imagine change will be acoming.
Now I'm all sorts of anxious about it. I didn't think I would be, but there you go.
In any case, I imagine change will be acoming.
Circumstances and Emotion
UPDATED AT BOTTOM
I fear I am suffering from circumstances of my own creating.
In general, things are moving along nicely. Granted, I have no steady job, but I have enough money to get by for a couple of months to give me time to come up with something. I'm starting to look more like a bowling pin than a stick, but various tests (Doctor and others) say I'm basically healthy, just out-of-shape. Where I am suffering is in the romantic area of life, and it is my fault.
I've come along tremendously in understanding and dealing with my crap from an intellectual point of view. What I have fallen flat on is in dealing with my emotional maturity, or lack there of. Plainly, I suck at connecting with people on an emotional level. It isn't that I can't do it, it is that I am scared to death to do it.
I can feel this tight ball of emotion kinda wrapped up nice and tidy deep in my chest and it scares me to even think about started to unwrap it. I don't know why and maybe I don't need to know why. Maybe it is just one of those things that I just need to do and not evaluate?
I thought dealing with anxiety and some other issues were tough. That stuff was a piece of cake compared to what I feel this is going to be. I know where to start. I even know who to talk to. But I feel paralyzed to do it.
As a result of this fear and inability (or unwillingness?) to act I think I lost, or am well on my way to doing so, a relationship that was very important to me. And that cuts me to the bone.
So I feel trapped in circumstances of my own making. I know the way out. Why can't I take that first step?
UPDATE: Just a point of clarification. When I speak about that ball of emotion it isn't about a single relationship. It is something that has been forming for years, ever since I started controlling my emotion rather than experiencing it.
I fear I am suffering from circumstances of my own creating.
In general, things are moving along nicely. Granted, I have no steady job, but I have enough money to get by for a couple of months to give me time to come up with something. I'm starting to look more like a bowling pin than a stick, but various tests (Doctor and others) say I'm basically healthy, just out-of-shape. Where I am suffering is in the romantic area of life, and it is my fault.
I've come along tremendously in understanding and dealing with my crap from an intellectual point of view. What I have fallen flat on is in dealing with my emotional maturity, or lack there of. Plainly, I suck at connecting with people on an emotional level. It isn't that I can't do it, it is that I am scared to death to do it.
I can feel this tight ball of emotion kinda wrapped up nice and tidy deep in my chest and it scares me to even think about started to unwrap it. I don't know why and maybe I don't need to know why. Maybe it is just one of those things that I just need to do and not evaluate?
I thought dealing with anxiety and some other issues were tough. That stuff was a piece of cake compared to what I feel this is going to be. I know where to start. I even know who to talk to. But I feel paralyzed to do it.
As a result of this fear and inability (or unwillingness?) to act I think I lost, or am well on my way to doing so, a relationship that was very important to me. And that cuts me to the bone.
So I feel trapped in circumstances of my own making. I know the way out. Why can't I take that first step?
UPDATE: Just a point of clarification. When I speak about that ball of emotion it isn't about a single relationship. It is something that has been forming for years, ever since I started controlling my emotion rather than experiencing it.
The Economy
Why does the economy tanking not send me into the corner to rock back and forth and fear the next 'great depression'? I have no idea. It certainly is bad. But I can't see how it could possibly be 'great depression' bad. There are no runs on the banks. They are talking about even uping the FDIC limits. We just forked over $700 BILLION to the idiots that got us in this mess in the first place. It was stupid to do, particularly given their track record, but it was better than doing nothing.
People are calling the floor of the Dow to be around 7300 points. That's just about 50% off of its peak. That is quite the dive, surely, and for those with money in 401k and other stocks its devastating. But only in the short term. That sucker will come back up and it'll be on more solid funding. The market has been riding one bubble after another since the mid-90s. It would have been nice to have a slow adjustment but it would have happened sooner or later.
The problems that caused this are systemic. Our markets are reactionary. The only way systemic problems were going to be addressed were by a reaction to something huge, like this. The deregulators that have been trying to roll back New Deal regulations succeeded and we all got to reap what they sowed. Hopefully, when the adults are in power again, they can re-establish regulations and get rid of the 'Wall Street Magic' bullshit constructions that led to this stuff. Get rid of this magic accounting crap that allows firms to push their bad investments to shell companies and to make up BS constructs like the Credit Default Swap packages so that no one knows who has what or how much it is worth.
What I am saying is this. The economy wreck doesn't send me into an apoplectic fear because this is what had to happen to fix the rot at the center of the financial markets. This is a good thing. Eventually.
People are calling the floor of the Dow to be around 7300 points. That's just about 50% off of its peak. That is quite the dive, surely, and for those with money in 401k and other stocks its devastating. But only in the short term. That sucker will come back up and it'll be on more solid funding. The market has been riding one bubble after another since the mid-90s. It would have been nice to have a slow adjustment but it would have happened sooner or later.
The problems that caused this are systemic. Our markets are reactionary. The only way systemic problems were going to be addressed were by a reaction to something huge, like this. The deregulators that have been trying to roll back New Deal regulations succeeded and we all got to reap what they sowed. Hopefully, when the adults are in power again, they can re-establish regulations and get rid of the 'Wall Street Magic' bullshit constructions that led to this stuff. Get rid of this magic accounting crap that allows firms to push their bad investments to shell companies and to make up BS constructs like the Credit Default Swap packages so that no one knows who has what or how much it is worth.
What I am saying is this. The economy wreck doesn't send me into an apoplectic fear because this is what had to happen to fix the rot at the center of the financial markets. This is a good thing. Eventually.
Totem
"Totem" - Rush
I've got twelve disciples and a Buddha smile
Garden of Allah, Viking Valhalla
A miracle once in a while
I've got a pantheon of animals in a pagan soul
Vishnu and Gaia, Aztec and Maya
Dance around my totem pole
Totem pole...
I believe in what I see
I believe in what I hear
I believe that what I'm feeling
Changes how the world appears
Angels and demons dancing in my head
Lunatics and monsters underneath my bed
Media messiahs preying on my fears
Pop culture prophets playing in my ears
I've got celestial mechanics
To synchronize my stars
Seasonal migrations, daily variations
World of the unlikely and bizarre
I've got idols and icons, unspoken holy vows
Thoughts to keep well-hidden
Sacred and forbidden
Free to browse among the holy cows
That's why I believe
Angels and demons inside of me
Saviors and Satans all around me
Sweet chariot, swing low, coming for me
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Resist
"Resist" - Rush
I can learn to resist
Anything but temptation
I can learn to coexist
With anything but pain
I can learn to compromise
Anything but my desires
I can learn to get along
With all the things I can't explain
I can learn to resist
Anything but frustration
I can learn to persist
With anything but aiming low
I can learn to close my eyes
To anything but injustice
I can learn to get along
With all the things I don't know
You can surrender
Without a prayer
But never really pray
Pray without surrender
You can fight
Without ever winning
But never ever win
Without a fight
I can learn to resist
Anything but temptation
I can learn to coexist
With anything but pain
I can learn to compromise
Anything but my desires
I can learn to get along
With all the things I can't explain
Wednesday, October 08, 2008
Next Trip
I've wanted to hit the North East for a long time. I've hit all the major parts of the country at one point or another and I've been to most of the continental United States. But I have not yet been to the North East past Rhode Island. Primarily I want to hit Maine and Vermont and I think doing it now, like within a couple of days, is starting to make the most sense for me. Mostly because of weather considerations (not too cold yet and the leaves changing).
So I'm pretty close to tossing some stuff in the Jeep and heading out for another week or so. No plan. No real destination other than the nebulous North East.
Anyway want to watch Mimic for me when I go?
So I'm pretty close to tossing some stuff in the Jeep and heading out for another week or so. No plan. No real destination other than the nebulous North East.
Anyway want to watch Mimic for me when I go?
'Know What We Are Doing'
During the primaries, I was all kinds of second guessing the Obama campaigns methods and such. Then I came across a quote from an Obama staffer that said something along the lines of 'Trust us. We know what we are doing.' Turns out, they did know what they were doing indeed.
I haven't forgotten that. So when I came across this picture I thought it was absolutely perfect to express that confidence:
Trust them. They have it under control.
I haven't forgotten that. So when I came across this picture I thought it was absolutely perfect to express that confidence:
Trust them. They have it under control.
Tuesday, October 07, 2008
Monday, October 06, 2008
Last night
Saturday, October 04, 2008
No Wind
Friday, October 03, 2008
Fruity Drinks
I must stay with more hard drinks when I drink hard liquor. Fruity and/or sweet drinks don't cut it. And bike rides. Bike rides and drinking do not sit with me.
Boat Drinks!
Back Online!
So the outlets in the boat apparently do not run on the house batteries, only shore power. My phone crapped out Tuesday evening. We are currently docked at Solomons Island until tomorrow morning. Late wednesday afternoon and through thursday was some crazy weather. Winds gusting up to 27 knots (alomst gale force). Awesome.
Rest of the trip should be mild and relaxed. More later.
Rest of the trip should be mild and relaxed. More later.
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
Lage Hadron Rap
You have probably heard of the LHC and the concerns over black holes eating the universe, etc. This is a rap about the collider and what it hopes to do. Very cool.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Adventures in Sailing! - Preparation Observations
In my first post in this shotgun shot of posts I talked about spending a bunch of time researching crap for this trip. In the second post I mentioned obsession. Obviously I'm a little obsessed about this right now. What surprised me the most in regards to this preparation is just how much there is to do to get ready for a week long cruise. For some reason, I didn't even think about how much thought would have to go into just meals and provisioning. I know, duh, but there you go. Three meals a day over a week translates into 21 meals that have to be accounted for in the provisioning. That means you need some sort of idea of how many times you plan on eating off the boat vs on, which ties into some sort of idea of where you want to go and stop. That's hard to do when we want our schedule as open and flexible as possible. So I opted for just ideas of places we could possibly go and that looked interesting, and we will probably just get way more food than we need. A framework, if you would.
Another observation have been how my feelings towards this cruise have been bouncing around. I've been consistently excited but for a while I was really nervous about the checkout part. Now that isn't really bothering so much because I think just the shear amount of preparation has kept me busy. I'm sure it'll creep back in tomorrow morning though.
Yay for learning!
Another observation have been how my feelings towards this cruise have been bouncing around. I've been consistently excited but for a while I was really nervous about the checkout part. Now that isn't really bothering so much because I think just the shear amount of preparation has kept me busy. I'm sure it'll creep back in tomorrow morning though.
Yay for learning!
Adventures in Sailing! - Quotes
I purchased this book called 'Things I Wish I'd Known Before I Started Sailing'. I basically goes through the alphabet and has short entries for everything under the sun in regards to sailing in it by a guy that has been sailing forever, including some circumnavigations I think.
Anyway, through out the book there are some quotes taken from others that I have found really really cool. I wanted to post a few of them that I really liked.
The first has to do with sailing becoming an obsession. I think my experience over the past week pretty much testifies that I've caught that bug. The quote is from E. B. White and goes 'If a man must be obsessed by something, I suppose a boat is as good as anything, perhaps a bit better than most'. Amen.
The next one turns out to be from a book my mother used to read to my brother and I back in the day, 'The Wind in the Willows'. In it, Mole is talking to Rat and admits he has never been on a boat before. Rat, astonished, replies, 'there is nothing - absolutely nothing - half so much worth doing as simply messing about in boats'. To this I have to totally agree. One of the reasons sailing has always been in the back of my head even while I had the speedboat was because there is so much more to DO in sail boats. Rat continues, 'In or out of'em, it doesn't matter. Nothing seems to matter, really, that's the charm of it. whether you get away, or whether you don't; whether you arrive at your destination or whether you reach somewhere else, or whether you never get anywhere at all, you're always busy, and you never do anything in particular, and when you've done it there's always something else to do...'. Love that and I am totally looking forward to never doing anything in particular.
Fear is the subject of the next quote. Fear is a part of sailing, no matter how experienced you are. This quote is straight from the author and says: 'Part of the attraction of sailing is that it frightens the pants off you now and then. Those of us who spend most of our lives cosseted in the comforts of civilization seem to crave the occasional brush with a manageable slice of terror, the better by contrast to appreciate those comforts. So we go sailing, we get a little scared, and everyone's happy.' That quote really put some perspective on this for me. I had never thought of being attracted to the scary times as part of the deal but it is true. I literally can not WAIT to sail in heavy weather. To have to fight the weather helm to keep the boat from broaching and wave whacking her on the beam all the while the wind and rain is pelting my face and I'm laughing in utter joy. Goose bumps, right there.
Finally, and this one applies to everyday life really, not just sailing, is this quote from the author: 'Three thoughts will keep you safe and add much to your enjoyment of a voyage. Think simple, think strong, think upside down.'. I already have the upside down part well practiced.
Anyway, through out the book there are some quotes taken from others that I have found really really cool. I wanted to post a few of them that I really liked.
The first has to do with sailing becoming an obsession. I think my experience over the past week pretty much testifies that I've caught that bug. The quote is from E. B. White and goes 'If a man must be obsessed by something, I suppose a boat is as good as anything, perhaps a bit better than most'. Amen.
The next one turns out to be from a book my mother used to read to my brother and I back in the day, 'The Wind in the Willows'. In it, Mole is talking to Rat and admits he has never been on a boat before. Rat, astonished, replies, 'there is nothing - absolutely nothing - half so much worth doing as simply messing about in boats'. To this I have to totally agree. One of the reasons sailing has always been in the back of my head even while I had the speedboat was because there is so much more to DO in sail boats. Rat continues, 'In or out of'em, it doesn't matter. Nothing seems to matter, really, that's the charm of it. whether you get away, or whether you don't; whether you arrive at your destination or whether you reach somewhere else, or whether you never get anywhere at all, you're always busy, and you never do anything in particular, and when you've done it there's always something else to do...'. Love that and I am totally looking forward to never doing anything in particular.
Fear is the subject of the next quote. Fear is a part of sailing, no matter how experienced you are. This quote is straight from the author and says: 'Part of the attraction of sailing is that it frightens the pants off you now and then. Those of us who spend most of our lives cosseted in the comforts of civilization seem to crave the occasional brush with a manageable slice of terror, the better by contrast to appreciate those comforts. So we go sailing, we get a little scared, and everyone's happy.' That quote really put some perspective on this for me. I had never thought of being attracted to the scary times as part of the deal but it is true. I literally can not WAIT to sail in heavy weather. To have to fight the weather helm to keep the boat from broaching and wave whacking her on the beam all the while the wind and rain is pelting my face and I'm laughing in utter joy. Goose bumps, right there.
Finally, and this one applies to everyday life really, not just sailing, is this quote from the author: 'Three thoughts will keep you safe and add much to your enjoyment of a voyage. Think simple, think strong, think upside down.'. I already have the upside down part well practiced.
Adventures in Sailing!
Tomorrow is the start of the big trip. For my first barebone chartering do I do something short to build confidence? Hahahahahahahahaha, no. What do I do? I charter for a week with a couple that is close to me starting at the head of the Chesapeake Bay in waters that aren't the easiest to navigate. The wind forecast looks like its going to be a biatch to make our way down to more open waters because Aberdeen Proving Grounds and their restricted water ways (restricted because of unexploded ammunition) restricts the amount of water there is to work in. Add to that thunderstorms during the day and what you get is the first day being the most challenging of the entire trip.
With that said, I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am about this trip. I could hardly sleep last night. I was like a kid trying to sleep the night before Christmas. I've spent the last week pouring over maps of the bay and looking at wind and weather forecasts. I have lists within lists of stuff. I think half of the reason I'm doing so much is because I need something to do. The other half has to do with mitigating some anxiety I have around this thing.
Other than some T-Storms on Tuesday and rain on Wednesday, the weather for the rest of the trip looks fantastic. Sunny days with the temp at or near 70 degrees. The evenings are going to be a little chill but good sleeping weather. And the winds. Well, if these forecasts hold up it'll be awesome in the late afternoons. In the mid-teens which, according to my really limited experience, is just about ideal for a 32 foot boat. The nights are going to be a little windy so it might make for some interesting anchorages, however. But I'll take that over still days.
All in all I figure any sort of plan I have in my head will just be tossed out the window as soon as we get underway and we'll just go where we feel like and the weather will let us get to. I have but one main goal on this trip, and that is to eat some crabs. I haven't all year and I must make up for that. Mmmmm...vinegar.
Wish us luck! If this turns out as fun as I believe it will, I'll take anyone who wants to go out whenever you want. The more the merrier! :)
With that said, I can't even begin to tell you how excited I am about this trip. I could hardly sleep last night. I was like a kid trying to sleep the night before Christmas. I've spent the last week pouring over maps of the bay and looking at wind and weather forecasts. I have lists within lists of stuff. I think half of the reason I'm doing so much is because I need something to do. The other half has to do with mitigating some anxiety I have around this thing.
Other than some T-Storms on Tuesday and rain on Wednesday, the weather for the rest of the trip looks fantastic. Sunny days with the temp at or near 70 degrees. The evenings are going to be a little chill but good sleeping weather. And the winds. Well, if these forecasts hold up it'll be awesome in the late afternoons. In the mid-teens which, according to my really limited experience, is just about ideal for a 32 foot boat. The nights are going to be a little windy so it might make for some interesting anchorages, however. But I'll take that over still days.
All in all I figure any sort of plan I have in my head will just be tossed out the window as soon as we get underway and we'll just go where we feel like and the weather will let us get to. I have but one main goal on this trip, and that is to eat some crabs. I haven't all year and I must make up for that. Mmmmm...vinegar.
Wish us luck! If this turns out as fun as I believe it will, I'll take anyone who wants to go out whenever you want. The more the merrier! :)
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Triple Gem
Friday night was a wild night. I ended up staying locally rather than going up to H-Town for the bestest most awesomest German restaurant on earth and it was a hard decision to make. However, I felt I needed to keep it to a smaller group so that ultimately won out.
In any case, I ended up hanging out with a couple of close friends and one of their friends. We hit Tuskies first then the little known but super awesome (usually) French cafe in Leesburg. Finally we ended up at Clyde's in Ashburn and required a taxi to take us home. 6 bottles of wine consumed in a relatively short time makes for a baaaaaaaaaaad Saturday morning for Ryan.
All three of these people are intuitive and painfully acurate at that. Additionally, two of them know their way around astrology and the other happened to have a tarot deck on his person. So the entire night revolved around card reading and chart interpretation. Their styles are different. Once is more gentle with another is brutal as shit but very perceptive and third falls in between. I was pushed pretty hard and they were hitting stuff dead on. The thing was, some of this stuff is stuff I don't particularly want to deal with right now and having it exposed, even in front of close friends, kinda got my back up a few times. In the end though, it was freeing and very much appreciated.
But on to title of this post. Apparently there are actually three signs that are important in astrology, before you get to the craizness of the houses. There is your sun sign, which most people know. Then you have a moon sign and an ascendent sign. It turns out that all of mine are Gemini, which I gather isn't the most common thing in the world. In fact, I believe one of the comments was 'Ooohh...I never met one of you before.' So I don't know what that means but there you go.
Triple Gem, biatches.
In any case, I ended up hanging out with a couple of close friends and one of their friends. We hit Tuskies first then the little known but super awesome (usually) French cafe in Leesburg. Finally we ended up at Clyde's in Ashburn and required a taxi to take us home. 6 bottles of wine consumed in a relatively short time makes for a baaaaaaaaaaad Saturday morning for Ryan.
All three of these people are intuitive and painfully acurate at that. Additionally, two of them know their way around astrology and the other happened to have a tarot deck on his person. So the entire night revolved around card reading and chart interpretation. Their styles are different. Once is more gentle with another is brutal as shit but very perceptive and third falls in between. I was pushed pretty hard and they were hitting stuff dead on. The thing was, some of this stuff is stuff I don't particularly want to deal with right now and having it exposed, even in front of close friends, kinda got my back up a few times. In the end though, it was freeing and very much appreciated.
But on to title of this post. Apparently there are actually three signs that are important in astrology, before you get to the craizness of the houses. There is your sun sign, which most people know. Then you have a moon sign and an ascendent sign. It turns out that all of mine are Gemini, which I gather isn't the most common thing in the world. In fact, I believe one of the comments was 'Ooohh...I never met one of you before.' So I don't know what that means but there you go.
Triple Gem, biatches.
Burn Before Reading
Saw this last night. It totally isn't what I expected but I liked it. Very quirky. Very funny (particularly towards the end). But about midway through there is a scene that is kinda like 'I never saw that coming' sorta thing. Wild stuff.
Adventures In Sailing!
So the plan right now is to charter a boat from Sept 30th through Oct 6th in the Cheasapeake. It isn't quite BVI but it is for a week. BVI can wait a few more months I suppose.
In any case, this is the boat we are going to charter that week. Currrently there are three of us going, myself and one couple. You better believe the couple is getting the cabin in the bow with the door. I don't need to see that crap. ;)
Anyway, in order to charter a boat the skipper has to fill out a charter resume. On this resume it asks for classes you've taken (the entire reason I went through the class process), boats owned, sailing experience and whether or not your first mate can get the boat back if the skipper is incapacitated. To the last question I answered 'Yes, under power'.
Well, I heard back today that my resume checked out fine (apparently my references are wonderful) so now we just confirm the dates and pay for the boat. Then they send out a contract and we are good to go.
I'm excited! The first one was going to be the hard one but as I build up some experience getting a charter is going to be easier and easier. I totally plan on figuring out how to do this during the winter, even it requires travel south.
Finally, we obviously will have some room. If anyone would like to join us for a couple hours, and day, or even a couple of days let me know and I'll see if I can make some arrangements.
In any case, this is the boat we are going to charter that week. Currrently there are three of us going, myself and one couple. You better believe the couple is getting the cabin in the bow with the door. I don't need to see that crap. ;)
Anyway, in order to charter a boat the skipper has to fill out a charter resume. On this resume it asks for classes you've taken (the entire reason I went through the class process), boats owned, sailing experience and whether or not your first mate can get the boat back if the skipper is incapacitated. To the last question I answered 'Yes, under power'.
Well, I heard back today that my resume checked out fine (apparently my references are wonderful) so now we just confirm the dates and pay for the boat. Then they send out a contract and we are good to go.
I'm excited! The first one was going to be the hard one but as I build up some experience getting a charter is going to be easier and easier. I totally plan on figuring out how to do this during the winter, even it requires travel south.
Finally, we obviously will have some room. If anyone would like to join us for a couple hours, and day, or even a couple of days let me know and I'll see if I can make some arrangements.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Roughing It
So several years ago my Dad, Brother and I tried to start a tradition of staying in a cabin once a year for a weekend and shooting the shit. Well, so far our annual outing has happened once. This year we are determined to make it happen. Check out the cabin:
Coolest Cabin Ever
The first thing I thought of was The Most Famous Cabin Ever.
So can't wait. I'll have to view the movie before I go.
Coolest Cabin Ever
The first thing I thought of was The Most Famous Cabin Ever.
So can't wait. I'll have to view the movie before I go.
I Have Resigned
Last night I sent my resignation letter to Tiber Creek. It happened rather unexpectedly over the past two days.
I had been with Tiber Creek for just about a year. During that time I earned the trust of my boss and was able to work from home pretty often. My normal day would be in the office for about 4 hours and work at home the remainging 4-6 hours. Usually would take a day off during the week but would work some weekends. As long as I was making progress they put up with it.
Over the past month I started part of a project that is in an area I really struggle with. It was a user interface that required a lot of attention to detail and got down into the 'can you move this two pixels to the left' sort of stuff that just makes me want to jump off a building. Anyway, I really struggle with this kind of thing so my productivity fell way off.
I mentioned that I was struggling several times to my boss in several different ways, but I never demanded to be moved to another project. My intention was to get through a major demo (occuring today, actually) and then request a transfer. So I was sticking it out.
So Tuesday night I did what I normally do and fired up the VPN (a secure way to access their network from my home) and started to work. About two hours into it I lost my connection, which happens from time to time. I was unable to reconnect that evening and was getting Account Disabled messaged. I went in early Wednesday with the intention of making up for the hours I lost on Tuesday night. No Sys Admins were in so I ended up twiddling my thumbs waiting for someone to show up to renable my account.
About an hour into waiting the CEO comes into my office and asks if he can speak with me. He never speaks to me. So he sits down and starts chatting. To make a long story short, he basically expressed a lack of trust in the hours I've been writing down and said that my productivity just isn't matching those hours. I explained that I have been struggling with the project I was on and that is why my productivity had fallen off. I also explained that I am more productive at home than at the office which is why I prefer working from home. At the end of the conversation I thought we had an understanding that during the period of time I am struggling I'll come into the office more to try and address his misgivenings. After the demo I would request a move to a new project that I would be more productive in.
Well, around 5 pm or so I get an email saying that 'Per our discussion, I have disabled your VPN access for the time being.' That surprised me since, as far as I knew, that wasn't part of our discussion and seemed pretty counter-productive to trying to hit a hard deadline. After three attempts at emails I finally wrote a pretty long one laying out what I thought his concerns were, what my concerns were, and other factors and said that I hoped we could come to an acceptable compromise.
Thursday morning comes rolling around and I have a reply. I didn't read it until just before lunch because I wanted to try to knock out some more work before something came along that pissed me off. Turns out that was a good move for when I finally read the letter I really got my back up. Basically the CEO's reply boiled down to two points:
1) I don't want to hear any excuses.
2) I can only bill hours I work in the office until mutual trust and respect can be reestablished.
There was no attempt to meet me halfway or to address my concerns. Further, I know what works for and what doesn't and a structure 9-5 office job does not work for me. My productivity will go into the shitter and I'll be miserable.
So after thinking about it and talking about the pros and cons of leaving over lunch I decided it was time to go. I worked until about 8:30 last night to make sure my part of the demo would be good to go. I also sat down with the guy doing the demo to make sure he understood it. Finally, I sent a nice long email explaining the stuff I was working on and where I was going with it.
Last night around 11:30 I sent my resignation letter via email to the CEO, my boss and HR. I simply stated as my reason for leaving that 'I was unwilling to work under the scrutiny and restrictions placed upon me in order to restore mutual trust and respect'. And that's that.
I figure between the two contracts I have (or, really at this point, contract and a half) I'll be ok for a couple of months. Between now and Nov. 8th I plan on volunteering for Obama and get involved in the political process a bit. I also will be looking for another contract or two or a new job. After Nov 8th I'll see what happens.
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes!
I had been with Tiber Creek for just about a year. During that time I earned the trust of my boss and was able to work from home pretty often. My normal day would be in the office for about 4 hours and work at home the remainging 4-6 hours. Usually would take a day off during the week but would work some weekends. As long as I was making progress they put up with it.
Over the past month I started part of a project that is in an area I really struggle with. It was a user interface that required a lot of attention to detail and got down into the 'can you move this two pixels to the left' sort of stuff that just makes me want to jump off a building. Anyway, I really struggle with this kind of thing so my productivity fell way off.
I mentioned that I was struggling several times to my boss in several different ways, but I never demanded to be moved to another project. My intention was to get through a major demo (occuring today, actually) and then request a transfer. So I was sticking it out.
So Tuesday night I did what I normally do and fired up the VPN (a secure way to access their network from my home) and started to work. About two hours into it I lost my connection, which happens from time to time. I was unable to reconnect that evening and was getting Account Disabled messaged. I went in early Wednesday with the intention of making up for the hours I lost on Tuesday night. No Sys Admins were in so I ended up twiddling my thumbs waiting for someone to show up to renable my account.
About an hour into waiting the CEO comes into my office and asks if he can speak with me. He never speaks to me. So he sits down and starts chatting. To make a long story short, he basically expressed a lack of trust in the hours I've been writing down and said that my productivity just isn't matching those hours. I explained that I have been struggling with the project I was on and that is why my productivity had fallen off. I also explained that I am more productive at home than at the office which is why I prefer working from home. At the end of the conversation I thought we had an understanding that during the period of time I am struggling I'll come into the office more to try and address his misgivenings. After the demo I would request a move to a new project that I would be more productive in.
Well, around 5 pm or so I get an email saying that 'Per our discussion, I have disabled your VPN access for the time being.' That surprised me since, as far as I knew, that wasn't part of our discussion and seemed pretty counter-productive to trying to hit a hard deadline. After three attempts at emails I finally wrote a pretty long one laying out what I thought his concerns were, what my concerns were, and other factors and said that I hoped we could come to an acceptable compromise.
Thursday morning comes rolling around and I have a reply. I didn't read it until just before lunch because I wanted to try to knock out some more work before something came along that pissed me off. Turns out that was a good move for when I finally read the letter I really got my back up. Basically the CEO's reply boiled down to two points:
1) I don't want to hear any excuses.
2) I can only bill hours I work in the office until mutual trust and respect can be reestablished.
There was no attempt to meet me halfway or to address my concerns. Further, I know what works for and what doesn't and a structure 9-5 office job does not work for me. My productivity will go into the shitter and I'll be miserable.
So after thinking about it and talking about the pros and cons of leaving over lunch I decided it was time to go. I worked until about 8:30 last night to make sure my part of the demo would be good to go. I also sat down with the guy doing the demo to make sure he understood it. Finally, I sent a nice long email explaining the stuff I was working on and where I was going with it.
Last night around 11:30 I sent my resignation letter via email to the CEO, my boss and HR. I simply stated as my reason for leaving that 'I was unwilling to work under the scrutiny and restrictions placed upon me in order to restore mutual trust and respect'. And that's that.
I figure between the two contracts I have (or, really at this point, contract and a half) I'll be ok for a couple of months. Between now and Nov. 8th I plan on volunteering for Obama and get involved in the political process a bit. I also will be looking for another contract or two or a new job. After Nov 8th I'll see what happens.
Ch-ch-ch-ch-Changes!
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Accepting Another
Question came up last night. Before you can fully accept someone for who they are, do you need to know, or even want to know, everything about them?
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Jimmy Buffet Gang
Here is a picture of the gang from the Jimmy Buffet concert. Check out the tall dude with all the crap around his neck wearing the stylish hat in the middle.
Financial Meltdown
Well, things are going from bad to worse. The market lost 500+ points yesterday with the news that more banks are going belly up. The entire point of bailing out Behr-Sterns was to prevent Washington Mutual and Lerhman Brothers from failing, which is what they are on their way to doing.
And even worse is AIG failing. From this:
What does this all mean? It means the S&L crisis of the 80's will look like peanuts compared to this. There is a possibility, and getting stronger, that we are just at the tip of the iceburg as far as bank failures go.
Buckle your seat belts, it could get awfully rough.
And even worse is AIG failing. From this:
If AIG were to fail, the global ripple effects would be unprecedented, said Robert Bolton, managing director at Mendon Capital Advisors Corp. It has $1 trillion in assets and operates in 130 countries.
[...]
"If AIG fails and can't make good on its obligations, forget it," Bolton said. "It's as big a wave as you're going to see."
What does this all mean? It means the S&L crisis of the 80's will look like peanuts compared to this. There is a possibility, and getting stronger, that we are just at the tip of the iceburg as far as bank failures go.
Buckle your seat belts, it could get awfully rough.
Monday, September 15, 2008
National Deficit, Taxes and You!
I'm not an economist and my understanding of macro- and micro-economics is slim to none. However, I wanted to point out something about deficit spending and taxes that you may not know (assuming this is right, of course, which it may not be.)
Deficit spending my the government (you know, the national debt) is one of those things that is a really big number but it is in that macro-economics realm where it is hard to give a shit about. I mean, how does the national debt affect you, right? Well, through ways that are complicated as crap, the higher the debt the higher the interest rates. Interest rates affect what you pay for your car, your house, your credit cards, etc. So a higher deficit means you end up forking out more for those items than you would with a lower national deficit.
Ok, so now taxes. Taxes affect your income directly so the cause/effect relationship there is clear. Lower taxes = more money you take home. Good times.
However, think about this. Your debt is probably higher than your income as far as total numbers go. Meaning, if you own a house, a car, run a credit card balance, have other loans, etc the total amount of all that probably exceeds the total amount you make in any given year from your paycheck, right? Let's put numbers on it to illustrate the point. Say your total debt is $400,000 (house, car, etc) and your yearly income is $75,000/year. Your tax rate is, oh, 18% or so and the combined interest rate you are paying for all that debt is somewhere around 7%. That means $13,500 of your salary a year is going into the void while $28,000 of your hard earned money is going into the void paying off your debt. So already the interest burden on your debt affect you more than the tax burden on your paycheck, even though it isn't as obvious.
Ok, so now say, because of the national debt, your combined interest rate for all that crazy goes up to 8%. However, the nice people in congress cut your taxes and now you only pay 15%. Alright! More money, right! Depends on what your definition of 'more' is. Now you are paying $11,250 in taxes but $32,000 in interest on your debt. So yea, you get the obvious $2250 increase in your paycheck but you end up forking out $4000 more in interest. So you actually end up loosing $1750. Damn politicians!
I say all that to say this. While tax cuts are fine and good, it is just pandering. It is an easy thing to explain to people that 'we are going to give you your money back' because it seems obvious. In reality, there is more going on. Those tax cuts tie directly into increasing the national debt which in turns increases your interest rates which in turn probably actually costs you more money than if the tax rate was maintained (or even raised some) and the deficit payed down.
Of course, there is a LOT more going on than just this but it is something to take into consideration when people fixate on just lower taxes. It isn't that clear cut.
Deficit spending my the government (you know, the national debt) is one of those things that is a really big number but it is in that macro-economics realm where it is hard to give a shit about. I mean, how does the national debt affect you, right? Well, through ways that are complicated as crap, the higher the debt the higher the interest rates. Interest rates affect what you pay for your car, your house, your credit cards, etc. So a higher deficit means you end up forking out more for those items than you would with a lower national deficit.
Ok, so now taxes. Taxes affect your income directly so the cause/effect relationship there is clear. Lower taxes = more money you take home. Good times.
However, think about this. Your debt is probably higher than your income as far as total numbers go. Meaning, if you own a house, a car, run a credit card balance, have other loans, etc the total amount of all that probably exceeds the total amount you make in any given year from your paycheck, right? Let's put numbers on it to illustrate the point. Say your total debt is $400,000 (house, car, etc) and your yearly income is $75,000/year. Your tax rate is, oh, 18% or so and the combined interest rate you are paying for all that debt is somewhere around 7%. That means $13,500 of your salary a year is going into the void while $28,000 of your hard earned money is going into the void paying off your debt. So already the interest burden on your debt affect you more than the tax burden on your paycheck, even though it isn't as obvious.
Ok, so now say, because of the national debt, your combined interest rate for all that crazy goes up to 8%. However, the nice people in congress cut your taxes and now you only pay 15%. Alright! More money, right! Depends on what your definition of 'more' is. Now you are paying $11,250 in taxes but $32,000 in interest on your debt. So yea, you get the obvious $2250 increase in your paycheck but you end up forking out $4000 more in interest. So you actually end up loosing $1750. Damn politicians!
I say all that to say this. While tax cuts are fine and good, it is just pandering. It is an easy thing to explain to people that 'we are going to give you your money back' because it seems obvious. In reality, there is more going on. Those tax cuts tie directly into increasing the national debt which in turns increases your interest rates which in turn probably actually costs you more money than if the tax rate was maintained (or even raised some) and the deficit payed down.
Of course, there is a LOT more going on than just this but it is something to take into consideration when people fixate on just lower taxes. It isn't that clear cut.
Sailing - ASA 104
So I finished the last course I'm taking this year. I'm now certified for 30' to 50' boats in coastal waters (within 3 miles of the coast). Now if I can actually convince a chartering agency to let me out, that'll be the real test.
Anyway, some observations over the weekend:
1) A 36' boat does not stop quickly and is really intimidating under power. Under sail it is a lot more work than a smaller boat but things don't have to happen as fast.
2) This course was easily the most challenging thing I have done both mentally and physically in a long time. Sunday was both some of the most fun and most frustrating moments I've had. My instructor purposely was trying to get me overwhelmed and frustrated, and he did a very good job at it. There is a ton of crap to keep mindful of when skippering and lot coming at you at once. Its very easy to get confused and miss things, particularly when frustration sets in.
Apparently this is something instructors talk about amongst themselves. When the instructor is there, the student is torn between giving their own commands, trying to figure out the commands the instructor wants to hear, and trying to figure out what questions to ask. I know I kept feeling the first two in spades. I wanted to make my own calls and fail on my own, I learn faster that way. I was torn between that and trying to answer the question 'right', even though there isn't always a single way to do stuff. So the end result was just me getting angrier and more frustrated and throwing my hands up a couple of times.
In the end, though, it was a very good experience and I learned a lot.
3) Driving a little Jeep after driving a huge sail boat is very disconcerting.
4) 20 knot winds under full sail close hauled is awesome.
5) Even though there is more time to think through things on a bigger boat, it takes more people and a lot more elbow grease. Skippering is going to be interesting. I apologize now for anyone I get short with in the middle of a maneuver. It is going to happen. If something goes wrong (and it will, without a doubt) there isn't time for being polite, orders have to be barked out and followed to keep things from really going to shit. That was really driven into me over the weekend. Being on the receiving end sucks at first but once you understand why and that it isn't personal, it becomes fun. :)
An example, sheets or sails kept getting hung up on rigging and open hatches. I wouldn't notice and we would be half way through a tack or something and the next thing I know my instructor is barking out really short orders in a less than soothing way. The situation would be resolved and we could finish the maneuver. I felt beat on but it was necessary to complete the maneuver without damaging anything. I think this is an example of being too hard on myself, now that I think about it.
6) One of the jarring differences between big boat sailing and small boat sailing is just how complicated some maneuvers can be. For example, a gybe on a small boat can be executed pretty quickly. In a big boat, there are a bunch of things that have to happen with the sails before the helmsman can even begin. Even thought he maneuver takes longer overall, there is so much going on that you need that extra time to address all, particularly with only two people. Three or more will be a fair bit easier and less hectic I think.
7) Life aboard a boat isn't bad. However, if you are tall like I am, you spend most of the time hunched over so you don't whack your head. Cooking wasn't too bad. It was easier than camping. I cooked all the meals as part of my training.
I think I'll end it there for now. I am really looking forward to skippering some charters with whomever wants to go. I have a good idea of what to do and how to do it but I need practice to solidify it all.
Anyway, some observations over the weekend:
1) A 36' boat does not stop quickly and is really intimidating under power. Under sail it is a lot more work than a smaller boat but things don't have to happen as fast.
2) This course was easily the most challenging thing I have done both mentally and physically in a long time. Sunday was both some of the most fun and most frustrating moments I've had. My instructor purposely was trying to get me overwhelmed and frustrated, and he did a very good job at it. There is a ton of crap to keep mindful of when skippering and lot coming at you at once. Its very easy to get confused and miss things, particularly when frustration sets in.
Apparently this is something instructors talk about amongst themselves. When the instructor is there, the student is torn between giving their own commands, trying to figure out the commands the instructor wants to hear, and trying to figure out what questions to ask. I know I kept feeling the first two in spades. I wanted to make my own calls and fail on my own, I learn faster that way. I was torn between that and trying to answer the question 'right', even though there isn't always a single way to do stuff. So the end result was just me getting angrier and more frustrated and throwing my hands up a couple of times.
In the end, though, it was a very good experience and I learned a lot.
3) Driving a little Jeep after driving a huge sail boat is very disconcerting.
4) 20 knot winds under full sail close hauled is awesome.
5) Even though there is more time to think through things on a bigger boat, it takes more people and a lot more elbow grease. Skippering is going to be interesting. I apologize now for anyone I get short with in the middle of a maneuver. It is going to happen. If something goes wrong (and it will, without a doubt) there isn't time for being polite, orders have to be barked out and followed to keep things from really going to shit. That was really driven into me over the weekend. Being on the receiving end sucks at first but once you understand why and that it isn't personal, it becomes fun. :)
An example, sheets or sails kept getting hung up on rigging and open hatches. I wouldn't notice and we would be half way through a tack or something and the next thing I know my instructor is barking out really short orders in a less than soothing way. The situation would be resolved and we could finish the maneuver. I felt beat on but it was necessary to complete the maneuver without damaging anything. I think this is an example of being too hard on myself, now that I think about it.
6) One of the jarring differences between big boat sailing and small boat sailing is just how complicated some maneuvers can be. For example, a gybe on a small boat can be executed pretty quickly. In a big boat, there are a bunch of things that have to happen with the sails before the helmsman can even begin. Even thought he maneuver takes longer overall, there is so much going on that you need that extra time to address all, particularly with only two people. Three or more will be a fair bit easier and less hectic I think.
7) Life aboard a boat isn't bad. However, if you are tall like I am, you spend most of the time hunched over so you don't whack your head. Cooking wasn't too bad. It was easier than camping. I cooked all the meals as part of my training.
I think I'll end it there for now. I am really looking forward to skippering some charters with whomever wants to go. I have a good idea of what to do and how to do it but I need practice to solidify it all.
Sunday, September 14, 2008
"Fiscal Conservative"
Here is a nice little cartoon for you to put how the last few administration's have faired in regards to the deficit:
It's funny how when you put an administration in power that doesn't believe in a strong federal government you end up with shitty results. Who could have possibly predicted that would happen?
It's funny how when you put an administration in power that doesn't believe in a strong federal government you end up with shitty results. Who could have possibly predicted that would happen?
Tuesday, September 09, 2008
Palin in Four Minutes
Everything you needed to know about Palin in 4 minutes.
Adding, the same people that were/are bitching about Obama's celebrity are now, apparently, purchasing Sarah Palin Dolls and Action Figures with no sense of irony at all.
Adding, the same people that were/are bitching about Obama's celebrity are now, apparently, purchasing Sarah Palin Dolls and Action Figures with no sense of irony at all.
Monday, September 08, 2008
Hahahahahahahahaha
Few things to laugh about.
First, for whatever reason, during the speech on the final night of the RNC convention there was both a blue and a green screen behind McCain. This, if you have been watching Colbert or reading this blog, has created a HUGE opportunity for mocking. And this is an awesome example of that. There will be much more coming, of that you can be certain.
Second, Tom Brady being out for the season. Bwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Thank you. I'll be here all week.
First, for whatever reason, during the speech on the final night of the RNC convention there was both a blue and a green screen behind McCain. This, if you have been watching Colbert or reading this blog, has created a HUGE opportunity for mocking. And this is an awesome example of that. There will be much more coming, of that you can be certain.
Second, Tom Brady being out for the season. Bwhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Thank you. I'll be here all week.
Sunday, September 07, 2008
Couple Questions
1) Can people act to help someone without something in return?
2) What is the fear that underlies vulnerability? Why are people afraid to show weakness before others, even close friends? What is that underlying fear?
2) What is the fear that underlies vulnerability? Why are people afraid to show weakness before others, even close friends? What is that underlying fear?
Saturday, September 06, 2008
Quotes I Now Understand
I like quotes, particularly the more profound ones. They offer little bits of wisdom very concisely. The thing about them is that, in my experience, you need to have some basis of experience to know what they are talking about. It is more like a concise way to sum up an experience rather than a way to warn or educate.
In any case, here are a few that I realized recently that I now understand where before I just thought I had an idea of what the quote was talking about or, in the case of the second one, was really puzzled about.
"Beauty often seduces us on the way to truth"
"It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved before"
"BOAT means Bet On Another Thousand"
"The two happiest days of a boat owners life are the day the boat is purchased and the day the boat is sold"
In any case, here are a few that I realized recently that I now understand where before I just thought I had an idea of what the quote was talking about or, in the case of the second one, was really puzzled about.
"Beauty often seduces us on the way to truth"
"It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved before"
"BOAT means Bet On Another Thousand"
"The two happiest days of a boat owners life are the day the boat is purchased and the day the boat is sold"
Thursday, September 04, 2008
Obama Writes Speeches!
Well I declare! Obama has been writing his major speeches. That's cool.
Unlike Palin, who speech was written a week ago for an unknown male pick:
So, who is the real fighter here? Someone speaking his own words or someone speaking words that weren't even originally written for her?
Unlike Palin, who speech was written a week ago for an unknown male pick:
Can voters this year be sure they learned something about the real Sarah Palin from her GOP vice presidential nomination acceptance speech last night, considering news that it was originally written by speechwriter Matthew Scully over a week ago for an unknown male nominee? The commissioned draft was subsequently customized by Palin and a team of McCain staffers in the 48 hours leading up to its presentation.
So, who is the real fighter here? Someone speaking his own words or someone speaking words that weren't even originally written for her?
Loosing an Argument
You know, there are some signs you can take from the phrases that people use that usually indicate when they aren't confident in their argument or feel like they are using. Two of them that I keep hearing from political shills, particularly McCain operatives recently when talking about Palin's foreign policy experience, are the phrase 'The fact is' and '[x amount of people] agree'.
When you keep repeating 'the fact is' all you are doing is trying to convince yourself. If it is a fact, it'll stand on its own. There isn't a need to identify it as such, particularly over and over.
The second phrase is more along the lines of trying to convince someone you are right by claiming lots of people agree with you so obviously it is right. Like 'millions of Americans believe the same things as Sarah Palin so her views can't be extremist.' Wow, color me convinced.
Anyway, just thought I'd throw those observations out there. And this isn't just in politics but in any conversation or debate really. Try it on your friends!
When you keep repeating 'the fact is' all you are doing is trying to convince yourself. If it is a fact, it'll stand on its own. There isn't a need to identify it as such, particularly over and over.
The second phrase is more along the lines of trying to convince someone you are right by claiming lots of people agree with you so obviously it is right. Like 'millions of Americans believe the same things as Sarah Palin so her views can't be extremist.' Wow, color me convinced.
Anyway, just thought I'd throw those observations out there. And this isn't just in politics but in any conversation or debate really. Try it on your friends!
Fact Checking the RNC Convention
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